October 8, 2024

GUEST EDITORIAL | Tips on coaching your own child on your team, by JOEY PIPPEN

This has been a couple of years, but pictured above: the Pippen family, from left: Cade Pippen, Kilgore coach Joey Pippen, his wife Lara, and Collin. (Photo courtesy of JOEY PIPPEN)

EDITOR’S NOTE: This article by Kilgore High School assistant baseball coach and assistant football coach Joey Pippen appeared in the December (most recent) edition of Texas Coach, a magazine of the Texas High School Coaches Association. Coach Pippen graciously gave ETBLITZ.COM permission to reprint it.

By JOEY PIPPEN, special to ETBLITZ.COM

I have had the pleasure of coaching my two sons Collin, a 2017 graduate, and Cade, a 2021 graduate, in high school. I was their position coach in football and able to coach them in baseball as well. I learned early on in my career from watching other coaches coach their own kids. That experience helped me better deal with all that came coaching my sons. Take time to recall the coaches that shared this same experience, and make a list of qualities and traits that you can follow. I advise anyone who is coaching or preparing to coach his or her own child to take time to…

  • FIRST, as a coach, it is crucial to separate the parent from the coach. I do feel it is extremely important to set some parameters as to how things are to be handled; remember that your primary goal is to develop the players, including your son, into better athletes and men. They need to be treated like any other player during practices and games. At games and practices, I am the coach; however, when I am home, I am a dad. Don’t get me wrong, there were times we talked about practices or games on what they could have done differently, we even have watched film again or worked on mechanics at home. It can be extremely difficult at times to separate the two. My wife and I always taught our two sons to work hard, be respectful, and communicate because they are being watched by the public for being a coach’s kid and a teacher’s kid.
  • SECOND, encourage open communication. Create an environment where your sons feel comfortable discussing their concerns, challenges, and goals with you. Encourage them to approach you with feedback just like you would with any other player. You have to treat your child equal to all the other players. There can be times dealing with accusations of favoritism and that is only one of the man challenges. There were times I was harder on my two boys to try and avoid the accusations. As the coach/parent, you have to keep your emotions in check during the games and practice; your child will never forget the time you yelled at him in front of his teammates because of him being a coach’s kid. I told my sons I’ll always support them in everything they do as long as they understand I’ll push them to be the best they can be.
  • THIRD, being a coach’s kid they have to remember they need to treat me just like they would any other coach. This is what I reminded them: if you wouldn’t as the other coaches who aren’t your dad about something, don’t ask me about it. I did tell them when entering high school it would not be an easy task. They know they did not choose the role of a coach’s kid buy they embraced it. They learned to embrace the lifestyle of being flexible of my schedule. When they were younger, many times, they would go back to the field house while I graded film after a game so they could spend time with me, or just being at practice. They also were our ball boys. They understood that I would be missing some of their events until they got to high school. Now my son Collin is a coach himself, and Cade is about to graduate college and coach, as well.
  • LASTLY, being able to coach your own child is like now other experience. There is a bond that you make with all the athletes you coach. But to coach your own child with the bond you form is something special and that can never be taken away. Coaching your own child can be rewarding for both you and your child. It does require hard work from both to set aside the father/son relationship. As long as you both can do that, there will be a lot of memories that can be made and that will last a lifetime. Make sure to spend quality time with your son outside of the coaching environment. Being a parent/coach can be one of the most rewarding, frustrating, and enjoyable experiences all wrapped into one package. Remember, it’s all about balance, fairness and keeping the best interests of the team at heart. Hopefully, these hints can help make this one of the best experiences you have in sports. If you have the opportunity to coach your child…ENJOY IT! IT GOES BY FAST! NO ONE CAN TAKE THAT AWAY! It has been the most rewarding time in my coaching career, and I would not have done anything differently.

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